A moment of pure surrender

On Thursday night, I set up an event on Facebook for a writing workshop that I want to host soon. I worked very hard on the layout, the graphic and the details so I was pretty excited (and SUPER nervous) to hit publish. But then I did….and I waited. And waited. And waited. By the time I went to bed, I had a few likes, but not much interest. Needless to say, I was disappointed. So when I got to my room, I heard a little voice in my head say “Hit your knees”. I knew that voice so I knew what I had to do. I had to surrender.

What do I mean by surrender? I let it go. I detached myself from the outcome I’d hoped for and I cut the cord. And, as I usually do, I asked for a sign to show me that I was on the right path by starting to plan out workshops like these. As much as I was excited about it, it wouldn’t really matter if no one showed up, right? Let’s just say someone heard me…

Message #1 : The next morning, I woke up to find out that Mother Nature has gifted us a lovely surprise : a very unexpected snow day! And since I only found out after I’d taken my shower, I was dressed and ready to go at 7:30 AM. What was I to do? I had the whole day in front of me! So I went down to the basement where my work space is and let it flow. I spent the better part of the morning listening to podcasts and writing at the same time. I was in a zone! Thank you Mother Nature for that unexpected surprise!

Message #2 : During one of the podcast, the speaker said something that I really needed to hear : “The more joy you feel, the more life will support you.” I know this, but I needed to hear it again. I can easily get sidetracked or discouraged and let my ego take over, but if I’m creating something from a place of joy, then that’s all that matters, right?

Message #3 : Mere minutes after hearing that message, I got a text from my Reiki teacher saying that she was proud of me for putting myself out there and that she was sending me lots of love. 💜

Message #4 : For lunch, I went upstairs and put on a CD that I love at the moment. When I opened the cover, I saw this quote that I’d never paid attention to before :

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I bought this CD in November and listen to it at least twice a week. I’ve never once looked at the cover art or the insert. I guess I just had to wait until I really needed to see that message.

Message #5 : After lunch, I went to pick up the book that I was working with in the morning and its laying upside down on the table, the back cover opened a crack :
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Funny enough, I’ve been considering hiding out for a few days to quiet the mind and even talked to my husband about it. Those are the moments when I am the most creative. So what am I waiting for? And where should I go?

Message #6 : Finally, later on that afternoon, my friend Annette, who is also my accountability partner, signs up for my workshop and excitedly messages me to tell me that she is really looking forward to it. I have one participant! Yay!

So why do we (ok, why do I) always have to have other people tell us that we’re on the right path? That what we’re doing has meaning? Or that what we do matters? I know all of this and yet, I question myself constantly. This is one of my biggest challenges, but I’m going to keep working on it because what I am doing truly lights me up and that’s the most important thing.

So thank you for all the messages Universe. My call was heard and answered and for that, I am grateful.

Have you ever had a moment of pure surrender? Is there anything you’re working on that excites you, yet makes you feel nauseous at the same time? How do you deal?

2 thoughts on “A moment of pure surrender

  1. Any time I start to waiver, or question in my own abilities, I need only look at you and everything shifts in me. When I see the path that you’ve taken, and the unerring passion that comes along with it, it motivates me to find my own path. Thank you for being a beacon of light and hope to us all.

    Liked by 1 person

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